Have you ever had a bad date? When we are young, everyone tells us to meet our Prince Charming while in college. “If you don’t know your husband by your Senior year—you have a better chance of being hit by a bus then finding a husband!” I was raised in a time warp somewhere between “The Help” and “Footloose”.  No stress there!

As an adult—dating becomes interesting.  Case in point—years ago—a married friend set me up.  Her theory?  If a man is single— I’m single—two single people should be together—right? Wrong!

So here I am agreeing to a blind date —all of my instincts telling me to stay home and spend time with my trusty canine.  She didn’t want to throw me completely to the wolves–so it was decided we’d double date to the Symphony. I loved the symphony, so why not?

We arrived at the amphitheater. My date was waiting at the bar—nerves must have made him thirsty as he was drinking like a dog on a hot day! As we walked up to make introductions—I noticed his shirt was untucked —and his slacks were dropped enough to allow his horizontal smile to shine in public. He smiled—put out his hand and shouted “Very meet to Wow you’re hot!”—the alcohol induced slurring and spitting causing much attention. He brought his outdoor voice inside. Joy—my date was the male alter ego of Roseanne Barr!

We filed in and took our seats. As the symphony started to play—he leaned onto me yelling — “Why are you single?”—”I think you’re hot!”—”Is that your God hair color?” —”Are you on a diet like most women?”

As I was contemplating how this wonderful gem had managed to avoid being snatched up—it happened—INTERMISSION!

Everyone emptied into the lobby for a drink. I slammed down a glass of Pinot Noir—watched my date fall to the floor—excused myself from the group and walked home.

Dating as an adult is like a box of chocolates—sometimes you’re going to be forced to taste one you don’t like! It doesn’t stop you from grabbing another one in the hopes it might just be the perfect flavor on the next try!